July 5, 2012

July 5, 2012

U-S-A U-S-A U-S-A

Did you have a good Fourth of July? I spent the night before at a party wherein I tried to interact socially as the humans do while kicking butt at party games. Moderately successful. I’m just not cut out for human interaction.

The holiday itself involved a trip to the National Geographic Museum. Had a Groupon expiring Sunday for the Titanic exhibit. I don’t know about you, but I enjoy nothing more on a holiday than pondering the death of thousand of people one hundred years ago. I’ll never let go, Jack!

Because it was eleventy billion degrees outside, we made our burgers on the stove. And by “we,” I mean “TheBoy,” because I am more of an eating person than a cooking person. But behold!

Colby jack, garlic, mustard. Exactly as Thomas Jefferson had his veggie burgers.

The big event in these parts, of course, is the fireworks. They broadcast them on PBS, but we threw caution to the wind and decided to find a live viewing vantage point. The problem with watching the fireworks on the National Mall is the fact that millions of people have the same idea. The exact same idea. So you end up with a sea of hot people who have no idea how to use the Metro. It’s a convergence that I want no part of. So many people find alternatives. Tall buildings with views of the Mall, and ideally not even in the District itself. We went to Long Bridge Park, a newly-constructed dealio right across the river from where the action was.

(Note that should nuclear weapons ever get launched from the Pentagon, Long Bridge Park will provide an excellent view.)

Folks, this turned out to be a brilliant setup. I’d nervously watched people head to the park all afternoon from the Metro station, and assumed it would be jam-packed with the festering masses I’d been hoping to avoid. We didn’t head over until 15 minutes before the fireworks started, because it was just too effing hot. But instead of moving to the end of the park directly across the river from the Mall, people were spread all along the length of the park. I’m honestly not sure that 90% of those people ended up seeing the fireworks at all.

But we did.

GOD BLESS AMERICA, BITCHES!

And after the 17-minute show was done? WE WALKED HOME. Phenomenal.

I hope that all countries celebrating independence this month have as much fun as we do.

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